Undertaker's Almost Surprise
by Scarlet has Fantasy Issues
Summary: Mark comes home and Kari has news for him, but he's not too surprised or is he? (characters from "Sorry") Undertaker/OC


**A/N: Hello there! I'm back with another wrestling one-shot, but this one ain't for Kane and Thea! Nope! This is for Mark and Kari, my neglected OC from "Sorry". She's that little funny character that makes Thea laugh and annoys the hell out of Kane, remember? No? Well, she's here with her own little story. And yep, Mr. Squishy is back too! Here you go, everyone! Enjoy!**

**OOOOOOOOO**

Kari Calaway idly played with Mr. Squishy as her best friend sat next to her at the kitchen table, thinking about things as Thea processed what the blond phenom had just told her. Mr. Squishy had been with her longer than her husband had and he was beginning to show it. And Moses had taken a chunk out of his ear when her son was a baby, but she wasn't mad about that. She loved her son. She loved her giant husband, who she hadn't seen in two weeks because he was wrestling and she was stuck at home because she'd pulled a serious muscle and the company's medical team didn't want her wrestling Superstars in that condition. Neither did her husband.

"You're going to have to tell him when he comes home," Thea told her quietly, bouncing her youngest son on her knee.

"Tell who what?" Kari asked, forgetting about her conversation as she played with her favorite farting hippo.

"Kari."

"Thea."

The purple-haired phenom shook her head and sighed. "Kari, you know that you're going to have to tell Mark about this when he gets back from the road. He needs to know that you're going to have to stop wrestling for a while."

"But I don't want to," Kari whined, shaking her blonde head. "I've already missed two weeks because of some stupid muscle. Over ten months of no wrestling is going to be torture! Absolute torture!"

Thea shrugged a shoulder. "You managed before."

"Yeah, once." She glanced over at her son as he wrestled on the living room floor with Dex while Blair watched from the sidelines. "But that was torture. I mean, I love my baby, but I don't want to go through that again." She looked back at Thea. "How did you do it three times?"

"I had help," Thea said, looking down at Alex. "And you know that I have another one on the way. I'm going to miss out on another few months of wrestling which means that Glenn's going to be on his own again. Let's hope he doesn't go all evil Kane on everyone's asses again because you won't be there to stop him."

Kari made a face. "Great! No one to keep that Troll from going evil on us! That's it! It's not happening!" She poked her stomach. "Nope!"

"Too late to change it, Kari. It's happening and you can't stop it." Thea smiled at her best friend. "What did you expect with Mark being so affectionate?"

Kari rolled her shoulders. "He's been all over me for the past few weeks. I mean, yes, it's nice. It's like when we were first getting together. All cozy and warm and happy. But I didn't want this to happen. I told you it wasn't going to happen. But it did. And now I have to tell him, don't I?"

"Yes."

"Great. I don't want to do it."

"Do you want me to do it for you?"

"No."

"Then you have to do it because someone has to tell him before someone gets hurt. If he thinks that you can wrestle and you lie about it and something happens, well, he's not going to be happy with you." Thea frowned at her. "And no one likes an unhappy Mark Calaway."

Kari shook her head. "No…but I could make him happy again. I always do."

"Not this time."

"I could."

"Kari."

"Thea."

Thea stared at her from across the table and Kari stared straight back, squeezing Mr. Squishy so that he farted. Alex clapped his hands together excitedly and reached for the hippo, but Kari kept him in her arms.

The two looked up as they heard a vehicle pull up into the driveway and a car door slam. A sudden feeling of dread built up in Kari's stomach.

"Looks like Mark is home," Thea said, smiling slightly as she looked back at the blonde. "You're about ten seconds from telling him that big secret."

"Lucky me," Kari muttered, waving a finger around.

"Kari, it's not going to be that bad. Mark loves you very much and he's going to be even happier when he hears your news." Thea reached across the table and patted her on the arm. "This is going to be good for you and your family. Trust me."

"I don't wanna. I don't want to do any of this."

"Suck it up buttercup." Thea looked towards the front of the house. "Here comes Mark."

OOOOOOOOO

Mark stepped into his house for the first time in a little over two weeks and breathed in the familiar scent slowly before taking off his hat and placing it on the hook. This was home, where his wife and son lived and where he could be himself with them. He knew that they had company just by feeling them and knew that it was Thea and her small brood. The Deadman set his bags down near the door and moved farther into the house, seeing his son wrestling with Dex while Blair watched and then his eyes turned to his little wife where she sat at the table with Thea and her smaller babe. Thea's stomach was growing a little firmer where her most recent child was growing, he noticed.

"Hello Mark," Thea said, smiling up at him as Alex waved at him, sucking on his thumb.

"Thea," Mark greeted, bowing his head slightly. He would never not be concerned about that girl after what she had endured in all of the years that he had known her. "How is the babe doing?"

Thea shook her head and brushed back a strand of her hair. "It's growing nicely. The doctors are monitoring it every week just like they did with the last two." She smiled reassuringly. "Nothing is going to go wrong with this one."

Mark nodded. "I pray not."

Thea pushed herself to her feet and situated Alex on her hip. "We should get going," she announced, looking back at Kari. "If Mark's home, that means that Glenn should be too."

"Okay," Kari said.

"Kids," Thea called out softly. "It's time to go. Say goodbye to your Uncle Mark."

Blair looked up at her mother's words and then over at Mark. Her face brightened and she danced over to him, holding her arms up expectantly. Mark reached down and scooped the little girl up into his arms, holding her against his chest. She had never been afraid of him, even in her young age. Blair placed her hands on either side of his face and stared him in the eye.

"I missed you, Uncle Mark," she told him softly. "But I've got to go home to Daddy now. So, I love you and I will see you soon."

"You behave, Princess," Mark told her in a gentle voice that he used for his daughters and now her. "And look out for your mother."

"Okay, Uncle Mark." She pressed a kiss to his forehead and then squirmed until he set her down. "Bye Aunt Kari! Bye Moses!" She laughed when he playfully swatted her on the butt to get her moving over to her mother's side.

Dex pushed Moses off of him and flexed his naked muscles as he swept his hair off his forehead. Moses playfully punched him on the chest and then danced backwards until he fell back on the couch, laughing it off. Dex marched over to Mark and thrust his hand out, sticking his chin out defiantly. Mark caught the boy around the neck and crushed him in a hug, not bothering with the handshake that the boy wanted.

_There's so much of his father in him_, Mark thought as the boy squirmed against him. _But there's also so much of Thea in him as well. I might have to look out for this boy in the future. He will need guidance…_

"Uncle Mark, lay off!" Dex complained against his stomach.

"I want you to behave as well, Declan," Mark told the boy, holding onto him tighter. "You're shaping up to be a man and you have a young sister to look after. And a brother that wants to be like you…Do not disappoint me, boy."

Dex sighed and became still. "Okay, okay."

Mark raised his eyes to Thea and saw that she was smiling slightly as he held onto her son. "Take care of yourself, Thea," he told her as she walked over to them.

"I will," she promised.

Mark released Dex and wrapped his arms briefly around Thea, careful not to put too much pressure on her. Thea patted him on the back and then stepped away, looking at Kari. She smiled and then called out to her children, giving orders to them to head out the sliding glass door.

"I'll have you guys over for dinner soon," she said, tossing the comment over her shoulder as she walked over to the glass door. "And Kari, be strong."

Kari grumbled and slipped onto the kitchen table. Mark watched Thea slip through the glass door and then disappear. His dark gaze turned onto his wife as she played with Mr. Squishy, the hippo that annoyed him, but not enough for him to make her get rid of it. If it brought her comfort, then he couldn't make her do away with it.

"Kari," Mark said softly.

"Oh, right! Hug time!" Kari jumped off of the kitchen table and bounded over to him. She jumped up and wrapped her arms around his neck, securing her legs around his middle. "I've missed you so much, Mark!"

Mark wrapped his arms around her, sliding his fingers through her soft blond hair. His lips pressed against the side of her neck and he smiled slightly as he breathed in her scent. He had missed her as well and he conveyed that through his touch. Kari shivered against him and pulled back slightly to look at him.

"Did you kick ass?" she asked, tilting her head to the side.

"Of course," Mark told her.

"Good." She pressed another quick kiss to his lips before sliding down his body. "Moses, I need you to go to your room. Mommy and Daddy need to talk."

Moses grumbled and rose to his feet. Mark ruffled his son's hair as the boy passed him and Moses swatted at his hand, obviously not wanting to be touched. Mark would have a word with him later.

Kari resituated herself on the kitchen table and held Mr. Squishy on her lap, stroking him like she would a cat. She hummed a soft song under her breath.

"Kari."

"Mark."

Mark shook his head at her and moved in closer. "You have something to tell me."

"I do, but I don't want to tell you. Because if I do, it makes it real and I don't think that I want it to be real." Kari shook her blonde head and made Mr. Squishy fart. "I know that will change everything for us. And it's a big deal."

"Kari, you're babbling," Mark told her, putting his hands on either side of her hips.

"But you love my babbling," Kari reminded him. "That's why you married me."

"I married you because I love you," Mark corrected her, resting his forehead against hers. "So, tell me what you need to tell me."

"I can't."

"Then do you want me to guess?" Mark asked, staring her in the eye.

"You won't be able to in a million years," Kari told him. "Not even with your amazing psychic abilities."

Mark smirked at her. "You're pregnant."

Color flooded Kari's cheeks and Mark knew that he was correct.

"How the hell did you guess that?" Kari demanded, poking him in the chest.

"Kari, I must admit that I'm not surprised," Mark said, not minding the sharpness of her poking. "I have been all over you in our moments together. If you were not pregnant, I would have been more surprised." He lifted an eyebrow at her. "Are you not happy that you are pregnant with my child again?"

"It's not that," Kari said, shaking her head. "I just don't want to go without wrestling again. I like wrestling. Big, cranky, muscly boys. You know that."

"I do."

"And I can't do that with something growing inside of me." She frowned. "But it's too late to change that."

"It is," Mark agreed.

"So, I guess we're having another baby," Kari said, smiling now. "A gigantic baby that's going to grow up looking like you."

"Or you."

Kari shrugged and leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips. Mark pulled her against him and held her there for several moments before letting her go, knowing that she needed to breathe. Kari laughed and shook her hair out.

"So, who is going to tell Moses that there's going to be another of us on the way?" Kari asked, nudging him between the legs with the toe of her shoe.

"I will," Mark said, knowing that he had to have a word with his son anyway. "I believe that you have a giant to annoy next door with your news before Thea does."

Kari's eyes brightened. "That's right! That big Troll doesn't know what he's missing!" She jumped up onto her feet, remaining on the table. "Have I told you that I love you?"

"Not recently," Mark told her, looking up at her.

"Well I love you," Kari told him, placing her hands on his shoulders. "And I'll prove it to you tonight, Mr. Calaway, but for now, Mr. Squishy and I have a Big Red Monster to annoy!" She pressed another quick kiss to his lips before jumping off the table. "Come Mr. Squishy!" She darted out the glass door. "Hey Glenn!"

Mark shook his head with a small smile. Some things never changed and God, he was glad that his Kari didn't.

**OOOOOOOOO**

**A/N: Well, what did you think? I had to do a bit here for Kari and Mark because I wanted to and felt like it. And I needed some humor in my life at this point as I've been down. But that's okay. Tell me what you thought, please. I like reviews. They're good with me. And I might be doing something to replace "Concrete Angel" in the future because train wreck was that one, yes? Yes. Let me know what you thought of this and feel free to check out my other wrestling stories and leave reviews on those too. I check out the old ones for reviews, so yeah. There's that. Thank you! And much love! -Scarlet**


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